The other day, I was watching an art-house flick. It's one of those think pieces, really, and how the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences ever overlooked it is borderline criminal. You may have heard of it, though: "Clerks II." In this classic of classics, Jay is standing outside the Quick Stop convenience store in beautiful New Jersey, getting all fidgety because he has nothing to do. A former user and abuser, Jay tells his friend Silent Bob that they better get busy, because "boredom is the road to relapse."
And that's kind of how you have to look at football's summer transfer window, especially when there are no league matches going on. Rumors swirl on an hourly basis, making it virtually impossible to parse fact from fiction. It's the old epistemological question from Philosophy 101: How is knowledge acquired? Some of these "stories" make you wonder, no?
But eventually, some of the gossip comes to pass as true -- you throw enough spaghetti at the wall, a few strands will stick -- and so far this summer, we've seen some interesting moves.
The biggest news so far, however, isn't a transfer. It's Carlos Tevez's big mouth. On the same day that Manchester City celebrated the arrival of Gael Clichy from Arsenal this week, the Argentine made himself the center of attention by announcing (again) that he wants to leave Manchester.
There's nothing like undermining what should have been a good-news day for City by throwing a poisoned grenade.
It's not a surprise, though. Tevez has proved himself to be the ultimate professional vagabond, at once a malcontent and mercenary wherever he goes. After spending the first four years of his career with his beloved Boca Juniors, the Argentine logged two seasons at Corinthians before going to West Ham for a year. After that, he donned the Red Devils kit from 2007-09, before making the much-celebrated move to City for the start of the 2009-10 season. Each time, Tevez has improved his lot in life by demanding, and getting, higher wages.
You're always told to be wary of someone who jumps around from job to job -- it's a telltale sign that raises concerns about the person's ability to get along with others. Tevez is that guy. He's no longer popular in City's locker room, if he ever was, with at least three players coming forward to complain about him this spring. And the players would no doubt prefer to see the well-liked Vincent Kompany wearing the captain's armband at the start of the upcoming season.
No one can question Tevez's ability, of course: 25 goals for Boca, 25 for Corinthians, seven for West Ham, 19 for United and 44 for City so far. The man is a goal-scoring machine.
Not bad for a player who clearly doesn't want to be at his club. In December, Tevez asked to leave Manchester because he said he had a falling out with the club's management -- "broken promises" not related to money, said the striker's agent, Kia Joorabchian. Apparently, Gary Cook, City's chief executive, hadn't lived up to his end of the bargain on some sort of deal. Tevez ended up staying and helped lead City to its first major title, the FA Cup, in 35 years. And now he's back at it, but this time he's claiming that he must leave because he can't bear to be away from his two children and that a move to Spain or Italy would enable him to be closer to daughters Florencia and Katie.
This comes about a month after the club virtually had to beg Tevez to show up for the FA Cup celebration.
When at first you don't succeed, try another excuse.
City supporters must feel conflicted: On the one hand, in the past two seasons, Tevez has scored or set up 42 percent of his team's goals. There's no one on the team who can come close to matching that (not even Mario Balotelli can instill that kind of fear, even if he wears scary T-shirts), and, for that matter, there are few strikers in the world who can have such a supersized impact for their club. On the other hand, fans must be tired of Tevez's discontent. You just don't support your club -- you love it, live and breathe it, and when a player openly and clearly doesn't want to be a part of it, you feel betrayed as emotion takes over.
But what this latest Tevez controversy has revealed is that Manchester City is not the same club that Tevez arrived at two years ago. Back then, City was trying to prove it could contend in the EPL. Signing Tevez was a statement of intent. The rebuilding project at Eastlands on the back of new owner Sheikh Mansour's apparently bottomless pockets was just getting started, and you could have made the argument then that the club was at the mercy of the player.
Not anymore.
City has made it clear who is boss by slapping a prohibitive transfer fee of 50 million pounds on Tevez. It's not going to be bullied into allowing Tevez to dictate terms. What will happen next? It's shaping up to be a staring contest to see which side will blink first.
There are only a few clubs -- mostly the usual suspects -- that can afford him. Then again, we could be looking at a swap for cash and players, or perhaps more likely a loan deal in which City eats a certain amount of the player's wages. You could see him going to, say, Real, which would happily ship out Karim Benzema to make room for Tevez. Juve and Inter have been rumored as possible destinations, as has Barca -- though the club is believed to not be interested as it continues its chase for Alexis Sanchez. Malaga, now with the financial might of Sheikh Abdullah Al Thani, could work its way into the picture. It's not hard to imagine a club ponying up a transfer fee, though Tevez will be challenged at this point to see yet another hike in his wages.
But again, this all doesn't solve the main issue for City: How do you come close to replacing Tevez's production? Sergio Aguero is the like-for-like candidate, with his future to be sorted after the Copa America.
In the end, no one is going to feel sorry for Tevez, least of all City. Even for a modern-day footballer, he's taken the mercenary role to a new low. And the only thing that has kept him from being exiled like, say, City's Craig Bellamy, is his savvy in front of goal. On some level, it would serve Tevez right if City forced him to honor his contract this season and squeezed even more goals out of him. For as tirelessly as Tevez works on the pitch, he's also relentless in testing his employer's patience off it.
Sunderland playing tall ball?
Steve Bruce has been wheeling and dealing in the transfer market, already signing seven players: Connor Wickham (Ipswich Town), Sebastian Larsson (Birmingham City), Keiren Westwood (Coventry City), Craig Gardner (Birmingham City), Ahmed Elmohamady (ENPPI), Ji Dong-won (Chunnam Dragons) and Roarie Deacon (Arsenal), with United's Wes Brown and John O'Shea reported to be on his radar. Of these pickups, Wickham stands 6-foot-3 and Dong-won 6-2. Wickham, in particular, has the ability to play the role of an old-fashioned No. 9, holding up the ball and playing down the middle, though his heading still needs sharpening. And Sunderland beat out PSV Eindhoven, Stuttgart and Schalke for Dong-won's services. The South Korean scored 16 goals in 44 games in K-League.
Photo op of the week
Arsene Wenger's Arsenal may be imploding before our very eyes, but that hasn't stopped the manager from a little R&R. Maybe he's in good spirits because there's some truth to the latest rumor that Juan Mata may be coming to the Emirates.